What I've Been Up To As Of Late...

Hey guys! So, I've been MIA for quite a while... and will be for another 2-3 weeks I think... but after that I am back and ready to party! So for those interested in the reasons for my absence, here you go:

Haha, I'm getting married! Yup, unbelievable, but true--best Christmas present EVER! Can't beat that. ;)

It's going to be fabulous--not only is my sweetheart so completely my other half (cheesy, but SOOOO true--let's face it, he's PERFECT for me), but my mom is making my wedding dress (finished today--it's her Sistine Chapel for sure!), my sister and I are making the bridesmaids dresses, and between myself and my family we're doing the decorations, flowers, refreshments, and cake--DIY wedding on a budget, but most definitely not cutting corners on style and beauty. Let's just say I'm super excited to celebrate my happily ever after. :)

Just a Note and Sunday Sweets

I apologize for my lack of posting for like, the last month... something came up... or, well, someone... heee hee heee... but that's a story for another day (soon my friends, soon). For now, just know that I am coming back! And it's going to be a party for sure--lots of new items in shop, a Valentine's Open House, and even a few special giveaways--stay tuned for next week! :)

So... I learned many things durin this break from blogging, but most importantly one simple truth: sometimes life has better plans. Fact of the matter is that God has a plan for you, and it's better than anything you could ever imagine for yourself--thus, just trust Him! (I'm still working on that at times) He knows what he's doing, and story he's written for you is the best one of all.

[http://pinterest.com/pin/41306521551835510/]

Sunday Sweets #12--A Little Bit More

What I love about first grade: CHRISTMAS!! There is no Hum-Bug or Scrooge on the planet that could resist the urge to smile when surrounded by 20 first graders filled to the brim with Christmas cheer. The second we got back from Thanksgiving Break it was Christmas to them--EVERYTHING IS CHRISTMAS!!--it's a blast for sure. I'm SOOOOOOOOOOO ridiculously excited for Christmas now! You see, Christmas through the eyes of a 6-year-old is the best kind of Christmas there is, hands-down. :)

So, last week as we celebrated Christmas in our little class, the kids wrote their letters to Santa; since it was a writing activity (don't worry, we are still learning, even with the hype of Christmas surrounding us), I had to read and check off all the kids' letters. This one cracked me up:

Dear Santa,

I hope you have a Merry Christmas! This year I'd like a Lalaloopsy or a camera or a puppy or new Christmas tree or a panda Pillow Pet or an Ipad or a new dress or a necklace or a trampoline or I would really like a panda Pillow Pet because I already have the puppy Pillow Pet...

This continued on for quite some time, but I'll skip ahead to the best part--at the end of her letter, she had written then following:

I'm giving you a dollar this year.

When I inquired about the dollar, she explained, "Mommy says that Santa is really poor this year, so I'm giving him a dollar to help out."

AWESOME! That totally made my day--even a 6-year-old is aware of what's going on to a point, and is aware that her Christmas may be a little smaller this year, but isn't discouraged by that fact, and is still enjoying it to its fullest just as she has every other year. I laughed as I continued reading pages and pages of Christmas gift requests, until I got to one of our students--now, this kid and I have been struggling recently. He's not a bad kid, but the past few weeks he has ignored anything and everything any teacher says--he refuses to do any work, and just pouts in the corner. I've been worried about him, because he's not always like this, but then again I figure that every kid handles the excitement and anticipation of the holidays in their own way, and maybe this was how he showed it.... but then I read his letter--it was the shortest one in the class, so I thought he was just trying to get out of the assignment, but when I talked to him he very sincerely explained that he really only wanted one thing:

Dear Santa,

I like your reindeer, Rudolph is my favorite. I would please like a blanket for Christmas. Thank you.

All he wanted was a blanket--not an Ipad or three pages of ridiculous 6-year-old requests, just a simple blanket. This boy, as I have come to find out, is the middle of several young children, in a family who is not at a financial high point. One day for Show-and-Tell, he brought in a new coat and proudly displayed it to the class, explaining that he had gotten it from the Bishop's Storehouse (a welfare program of the LDS Church). He was so excited and so proud of his new jacket, but it broke my heart--no 6-year-old should have to face the harsh  realities of life, at least not for a few more years, but here this little boy does every day and doesn't ever complain. And all he wants for Christmas is a simple blanket to keep him warm! It made me, once again, realize that Christmas isn't about all the decorations or finding the perfect gift for that special someone--not that those things are bad, I revel in them every year--but at the heart of it, Christmas is, well, about something more.

[http://pinterest.com/pin/41306521551924312/]

In the words of the wonderful Elder Jeffrey R. Holland,

As happens so often if we are not careful, the symbols can cover that which is symbolized. In some of our lives the manger has already been torn down to allow for a discount store running three-for-a-dollar specials on gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

I do not feel—or mean this to sound—like a modern-day Scrooge. The gold, frankincense, and myrrh were humbly given and appreciatively received, and so they should be, every year and always. As my wife and children can testify, no one gets more giddy about the giving and receiving of presents than I do.

But for that very reason, I, like you, need to remember the very plain scene, even the poverty, of a night devoid of tinsel or wrapping or goods of this world. Only when we see that single, sacred, unadorned object of our devotion—the Babe of Bethlehem—will we know why “tis the season to be jolly” and why the giving of gifts is so appropriate.

It is for this baby that we shout in chorus: “Hark! the herald angels sing Glory to the newborn king! … Mild he lays his glory by, Born that man no more may die: Born to raise the sons of earth, Born to give them second birth.” (Hymns, no. 60.)

Perhaps recalling the circumstances of that gift, of his birth, of his own childhood, perhaps remembering that purity and faith and genuine humility will be required of every celestial soul, Jesus must have said many times as he looked into the little eyes that loved him (eyes that always best saw what and who he really was), “Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.” (Matt. 18:3.)

Christmas, then, is for children—of all ages....

"Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before! 'Maybe Christmas,' he thought, 'doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas... perhaps... means a little bit more!"

(Elder Holland's excepts come from an address given to the Religious Instruction faculty at Brigham Young University, December 12, 1976; as well as from Dr. Suess' How the Grinch Stole Christmas, New Year: Random House, 1957).

Sunday Sweets #11

[http://pinterest.com/pin/41306521551797377/]

Life is a beautiful thing--don't forget to take some time to enjoy it.

What I Wore--Interviews Galore

If at first you don't succeed, try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try again... and if that doesn't work, get some rest and try again tomorrow.

Do you know how many jobs I have applied for in the past year? How many interviews I've gone too? Seriously, this economy is not treating my family so great... or anyone I know for that matter--when I graduated from high school, you could get most jobs you wanted--not necessarily ghte best jobs, but decent ones. Now you can't even get the cheap high school level jobs, it's ridiculous! I have an extremely qualified friend who interviewed for 70 jobs before getting just a part-time job--ridiculous! After a while it almost doesn't even seem worth it... 

but then there was this one job that I was especially interested in, so I decided to actually put some effort into my interview (I've been getting lazy, not going to lie--of course, lazy for me is like A- work, haha--yes, an A- is considered failing in my head :P)--or at least find something enjoyable about it (I HATE INTERVIEWS!! It's like, let's see how stupid we can make you feel, and if there is anything left of you after the humiliation and belittlement, well... we'll got from there), so, here is my new job interview outfit:

Oh, and in case you're wondering if I use shopping as a pick-me-up even though I have no money, I most certainly do not! This entire ensemble came was born out of forgotten remnants of my closet (some even as far back as high school maybe--gasp!). I didn't spend a cent thank you very much!

I was pretty proud of myself, not gonna lie--especially since chic-business-like attire usually isn't my forte--but once I put it together, I was rather enjoying it:

Sometimes a little black, some stiletto heels, a nice high-waist pencil skirt, and a good pair of sunglasses can really give you an awesome boost of feminine confidence--this "nobody-better-mess-with-me-because-I-just-look-too-dang-good" feeling. I don't know, maybe it's just me. ;)

So, having said that, I want to say that I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL that I now have a job! and more importantly, I LOVE IT!!! Seriously, who knew that going to work every day could be this much fun??? Maybe that little boost of confidence was exactly what I needed, who knows. 

"You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might find, you get what you need." 

~The Rolling Stones

Sunday Sweets #2

I haven't been linking up and posting quite as much these days, because... drum-roll... I finally got a job! (P.S. this economy is not my friend at the moment) It's been over a year looking with much frustration, but now that it's finally happened I can see why I needed to wait--I needed to wait so that I could get this particular job, because let me tell you--IT'S THE BEST JOB IN THE ENTIRE WORLD! I'll have to tell you about it sometime, because everyday it just makes me smile. :)

However, for now I just want to quickly focus on the frustration beforehand part--sometimes things don't work out like you think they should, or hope that they should, and you just keep wondering what you're doing wrong, or what more you need to do, or you dwell on the mistakes of the past, or you remember better times and wonder if happy days will ever be here again... it happens to everyone, don't worry. My advice is simple, but it's the best advice I've ever received: KEEP MOVING FORWARD. Have you ever seen Disney's MEET THE ROBINSONS? If you haven't, I very highly recommend it--feel good movie, funny, and has a great message-->KEEP MOVING FORWARD! The main character is a cute little boy with some serious self-confidence problems (yes, none of us can relate to that I'm sure), and he has to learn that everyone makes mistakes--what's important is that you keep moving forward in life, because there are so many wonderful things yet to come.

[http://pinterest.com/pin/132879746/]

Sunday Sweets #1

 [http://weheartit.com/entry/7734625]

[http://weheartit.com/entry/10051542]

[http://dianhasan.wordpress.com/2011/08/20/quotes-thoughts-on-being-unique/]

I have nothing more to add than a huge AMEN to that. <3

Bloom Where You're Planted

Not too long ago I spent a weekend at my Grandma's house--she just had open heart surgery, about a billion complications, some more surgeries, and about two weeks in the ICU. Fun times--I was asked to stay with her to help, but when I got there she was up and about and doing (to me) ridiculously well--I couldn't believe it! She's one tough lady, that's for sure. I think the saddest thing for me was that she was just getting ready to plant many of her flowers the day she went into the hospital--my Grandma always has the most beautiful flower garden, she just loves gardening--so I know she was discouraged a bit that she hadn't been able to complete her planting yet. However, as I was doing dishes one afternoon I discovered this gorgeous hot pink hollyhock flower growing outside the kitchen window:

Isn't it just GORGEOUS?? I love the bright color--and this thing is HUGE!

I went outside to check it out, and upon closer inspection I realize that this plant isn't growing quite like I originally thought--these aren't the best pictures ever, but if you look closely you can see that it is growing out of the window well!

Yep, all the way down there--several feet I might add--is the start of this beautiful flower--growing up and out of the window well into the sun! My Grandma informed me that she hadn't planted this particular flower (obviously), but it had grown up on it's own, and she left it where it was because it was just so amazing and beautiful.

So, besides that I pretty much just though this flower was awesome, there is a moral to the story of course: I feel like there are so many things in life that are out of my control, and as a control freak and perfectionist this is very troubling at times--I want to help, I want to initiate change, I want to make the world a better place--these are all wonderful desires, but there are some things in life that honestly are out of our control--you can't make life perfect, there will always be things and circumstances that we may not like yet are completely out of our hands. However, that doesn't mean that "Life sucks, then you die" (a favorite quote of mine, admittedly); you can enjoy life, and you will never be denied any joy or blessing, no matter how bleak your circumstances may seem, just as long as you keep trying--Look at this flower? Falling into the dark, cold rock bed of a window well probably wasn't the ideal circumstance and placement for it, but did that stop it from growing into an amazing and beautiful flower? It's the most beautiful flower in the entire garden! So, as cheesy and cliche as it sounds, the saying continues to hold true: 

BLOOM WHERE YOU'RE PLANTED. 

And I would like to add that it doesn't say GROW where you're planted, or SURVIVE where you're planted--those things are easy; what's hard but what is definitely most important and most fulfilling in life is to BLOOM where you're planted--it is very clear: BLOOM. Don't ever think that you can't do it--because you can, and you can do it beautifully. Do your best, and in the end it will all work out.

Thank Goodness

[http://tradingphrases.com/images/T/IN009_AfterallIIConverted.JPG]

A Beastly Crush

I am absolutely loving my Folklore class, because not only do I get to read fairy tales for class, but there is actually much more involved in those fairy tales than I remember--they are pretty deep, if you look at them right. They have innumerable layers that continue to astound and amaze me. It's quite the learning process, for sure. Anyhow, yesterday we were studying Beauty and the Beast, along with its other variants (The Pig King, The Frog King, The Tiger's Bride, Urashima the Fisherman, The Frog Princess, The Swan Maiden, etc) and the group that was presenting offered this parody of the Disney version:

When I first saw the film as a child, that was exactly how I felt. Now of course I am coming to understand more about inner beauty and the transformative power of love and all the really awesome lessons and meanings from it, but this most definitely made my day. What can I say, I've always had a thing for the beast. :)

One Day

I realize this is slightly cheesy and it's country (gasp) but it has a good message, and for some reason it really got to me today.

Good Things to Come

Do you ever have those days where you just want to go to bed so that tomorrow will come and today will be over forever? Yeah, it happens--not every day is filled with sunshine and rainbows. But you know, there are only 24 hours in a day--a good day or a bad day--it can't last forever, and the beauty of life is that as bad as things may seem, the best is always yet to come.

funny how we affect one another

Puppy Therapy

"When you feel lousy, puppy therapy is indicated."

--Sara Paretsky

MacGyver's mama had puupies! Five sweet little girls--they are about 5-6 weeks old now, and we got to visit them today. I am stealing one for myself I think...

thank you for loving me

"Love me when I least deserve it because that's when I really need it."

-Swedish proverb

I know this isn't a newsflash by any means, but I can be a serious brat sometimes--thank you to all those who love me anyway. <3

Beauty

"Nothing makes a woman more beautiful than the belief that she is beautiful." -Sophia Loren

Who can argue with that? Like any normal female mortal being, I have had troubles with my self-esteem and body image from time to time. I remember being on the ballroom dance team in Junior High: my mom had to custom make or alter all my costumes because they didn't have any that were big enough for me. Many of those lovely girls wanted me off the team, because I didn't represent the thin and "beautiful" image that ballroom should portray. I was crushed. Our coach pulled me aside and told me not to listen: "Look at your mother, one day you will look like that too." My mother is drop-dead gorgeous, and I'll bet none of you can ever figure out just how old she is. The problem was that I was 12 and didn't want to wait that long to be beautiful--I was ashamed, and I'm not sure I ever got over it.

Until now. The past few years have been a struggle, particularly this past year with surgery and whatnot, but these trials brought more blessings than I could ever wish for, for one: an understanding of worth and a love of self. I worked my butt off trying to be beautiful, but I remember the day I could successfully fit into a pair of size 0 jeans--my dream was to be a size 6, so a size 0 was above and beyond my dreams. Yet as I stood looking into the dressing room mirror, I wasn't happy at all. It didn't matter what size I wore or how much I weighed--I wasn't happy with myself, and no amount of external change was going to fix that. I had to learn HOW to be beautiful--DEEP BEAUTY, not this Hollywood drama. True beauty comes from within; I know we've all heard that, but it couldn't be more true.

A few months ago a friend of mine told me that he had to stare into a mirror and repeat "I am happy" over and over and over until he believed it. It seemed to simple to work, but I trusted him and gave it a shot. Every morning--every time I passed a mirror or a reflecting window--I looked myself square in the eyes and said, "I am happy, and I am beautiful." I felt ridiculous at first, but after a while something changed. I found myself passing mirrors or building windows, even car windshields, and without the effort my mind would shout "I AM HAPPY AND I AM BEAUTIFUL! Heck girl, I am absolutely gorgeous!" It may sound vain to you, but stop and think for just a moment: how many of us are actually excited to look into a mirror? In fact, according to a recent BYU study, the fear of getting fat is seen even in the brain scans of healthy, well-adjusted women . None of us are safe unless we come to know and understand the truth.

In his address "Reflection in the Water," Elder Deiter F. Uchtdorf explains how we are all like Hans Christian Andersen's THE UGLY DUCKLING:

"Like this young swan, most of us have felt at one time or another that we don’t quite fit in. Much of the confusion we experience in this life comes from simply not understanding who we are. Too many go about their lives thinking they are of little worth when, in reality, they are elegant and eternal creatures of infinite value with potential beyond imagination....

My dear young friends, this knowledge allows you to see your own reflection in the water. It assures you that you are not ordinary, rejected, or ugly. You are something divine—more beautiful and glorious than you can possibly imagine. This knowledge changes everything. It changes your present. It can change your future. And it can change the world."

We are all divine and beautiful--beauty and happiness doesn't come through anything that this world has to offer. It comes only from the love of God that we find within. If you ever find yourself struggling, turn to Him and He will show you time and time again what a wonderful being you truly are. You are beautiful, and don't ever let anyone ever tell you different. <3

be still--it's a still small voice afterall

I have an imagination like you would not believe. I also think in ways that you would never imagine--my mind is constructed in a strange way. Sometimes this is great--like when I forget to do the reading for a debate, but can still win the argument. However, it's not so great when it comes to revelation and inspiration--how do I know whether or not it is the spirit or my own wild imagination? This article is the perfect answer, I highly recommend reading the entire thing. However, I was especially touched by this last segment; it was humbling because I am guilty of many of the don'ts (tiredness, stress, busyness, worry...). But I am also proudly guilty of the do's sometimes. :) The point of my rambling is read his counsel and apply it to your life--in a world of so much chaos and stress and no time for anything, let us put aside time for God to speak to us. Trust me, I can testify from experience that it saves a whole heck of a lot of time and stress and worry.

What can I do to enhance my ability to hear, recognize, and follow the voice of the Lord? (from "Is It Revelation?" by Elder Gerald N. Lund)

There are many answers that could be given to that question: be worthy, pray always, earnestly seek the Lord, follow the General Authorities. But I should like to answer in a little different way.

The Lord’s voice is still and small and it whispers. If our lives are filled with “noise,” we will find it difficult to hear. We must find ways to reduce the inner noise in our lives and create times of inner stillness and quiet.

There are many sources of inner noise. Some are obvious. Sin can create tremendous inner noise. Anger and contention are a major source of inner noise. Other sources of inner noise are not necessarily bad in and of themselves. Physical tiredness, stress, busyness, apathy, and worry can all create inner noises of their own.

Even outer noise can detract from inner quiet. We often live in envelopes of outer noise. This is not a bad thing, but it may interfere at times with the quiet whisperings the Lord wants to give us.

Let me mention one other common source of great inner noise. When we desperately desire something, it creates a great rush of emotion within us. And high emotion can mask or cover spiritual promptings. Even if the thing we desire is a good thing, our “wants” may be so high that we become unwilling or unable to hear the Lord’s will in the matter.

Thankfully, the scriptures and the prophets teach us how to reduce inner noise and create times of quiet and reverence.

Reading and studying the word of God is a great source of inner quiet. You can feel things begin to change. The agitation melts away, and peace comes in its place. I have experienced that time and again in my own life.

Prayer is another source of inner quiet and serenity. I am not talking about the I-have-to-do-my-duty sort of prayers. I speak of prayers that are consistent, focused, and submissive to God’s will.

We can increase our own personal reverence. In sacrament meetings we can sit quietly and prepare for the covenant-making process offered there. We witness to God that we are willing to “always remember him” (see D&C 20:77, 79). If we keep that covenant, we shall always have His Spirit to be with us.

Finally, deliberately put aside the cares of the world, put aside the rush of our daily lives, and find a quiet place and a quiet time to sit and ponder and reflect and meditate.

If the voice of the Lord is still and small and it whispers, should it surprise us that His counsel is “Be still and know that I am God”? (D&C 101:16). There is great significance to that simple statement. Only as we are still can we learn to hear the still, small voice.

“The Spirit does not get our attention by shouting or shaking us with a heavy hand. Rather it whispers. It caresses so gently that if we are preoccupied we may not feel it at all. …

“Occasionally it will press just firmly enough for us to pay heed. But most of the time, if we do not heed the gentle feeling, the Spirit will withdraw and wait until we come seeking and listening.”
—President Boyd K. Packer, Acting President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, “The Candle of the Lord,” Ensign, Jan. 1983, 53.

love doesn't give up

I'm too tired and have no time to blog these days--the next two weeks are basically Hell, so don't take it personally if I don't talk to you for a while. Too much time and not enough to do--or something like that, right? :P Anyway... in my few minutes of brainless internet time before bed I came across Elein's amazing blog--by the way Elein, you always say just what I need to hear at that very moment I need it most, for sure. Elein Dodge is seriously one of the many wonderful tender mercies in my life. Since I don't have time to come up with my own original thoughts, enjoy hers instead:

“When I’m tempted to do something that feels like giving up, I won’t … because love doesn’t give up (I Corinthians, 13). But, lest I push love aside, I will make sure that what I’m holding on to can coexist with love.” ~ Jan Denise

People are important. Never give up on them. I learned that this weekend. It was mostly about family members and ourselves but I think it can be extended. It’s true, we should never give up on family. We should never give up on ourselves and slip into oblivion’s misery. We shouldn’t give up on people who make us happy. We shouldn’t give up on people who obviously need our influence in their lives. Relationships can get really hard. Relationships take a lot to maintain and they can be draining. But, never give up on those relationships that you treasure. Love yourself, love your family, and love your fellowmen. (http://yourbiggestfan30.wordpress.com/)

AMEN.

have you ever felt this way?

This is a very interesting performance for sure, but mostly I just love this song--it is my new favorite. If you really listen to the lyrics, they are absolutely beautiful.

"Glitter In The Air"

PINK

Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands?
Close your eyes and trust it, just trust it
Have you ever thrown a fist full of glitter in the air?
Have you ever looked fear in the face
And said I just don't care

It's only half past the point of no return
The tip of the ice burg
The sun before the burn
The thunder before lightning
The breathe before the fraze
Have you ever felt this way?

Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone?
You're whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone
Have you ever been touch so gently you had to cry?
Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside?

It's only half past the point of oblivion
The hourglass on the table
The walk before the run
The breathe before the kiss
And the fear before the flames
Have you ever felt this way?

La La La La La La La La

There you are, sitting in the garden
Clutching my coffee,
Calling me sugar
You called me sugar

Have you ever wished for an endless night?
Lassoed the moon and the stars and pulled that rope tight
Have you ever held your breathe and asked yourself will it ever get better than tonight?
Tonight

SUNSHINE, my one true love...

Oh how I am in love with the sun, I can't even begin to tell you--it's nearly impossible to be sad on a day like today, it's just absolutely gorgeous. The only problem is that I want to play with the sun instead of doing homework... oh bother. I spent the afternoon outside enjoying the light Spring breeze and the blessed warmth of the sun--like April 25, not too hot and not too cold, all you need is a light jacket. Dear Sun, I love you dearly.

"A cloudy day or a little sunshine have as great an influence on many constitutions as the most recent blessings or misfortunes."

Joseph Addison